The big test

The big test
Little Johnny stared at his test paper. The big read “F” stared back at him.
Freddie looked at his glum friend and asked.
“Why did you get such a low grade on that test?”
“Because of an absence,” Johnny answered.
“You mean you were absent on the day of the test?” he questioned.
Little Johnny replied, “No, but the kid who sits next to me was.”


Man’s best friend
A wife says to her husband one weekend morning,
“We’ve got such a clever dog. He brings in the daily newspapers every morning.”
Her husband replied,
“Well, lots of dogs can do that.”
The wife responded,
“But we’ve never subscribed to any papers!”


Swear
“Do you love me?”
“Yes, dear.”
“Would you die for me?”
“No,---mine is undying love.”